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Name: James the Exceedingly Evil | Gender: Phan Dude | Age: 29 | Posts: 1,908 | Roses: 0
Old 03-20-2008 at 03:17 AM
IamErik771
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Here are some highlights from my own experience with iGod. Those of you who are devoutly religious, please donít take offense. ^_^;

*******


Me: My name is James.
God: What's up, James.
Me: You're God... You tell me.
God: Yup. That's me alright. What do you want me to tell you?
Me: It's supposed to be 'all right!' Not 'alright.'
God: Should I know it is?

Me: Do you think I'm sexy?
God: Yes you look great to me.
Me: Would you sleep with me?
God: I am not so sure if I would like to sleep with you.
Me: Why not?
God: Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because.

Me: Am I evil?
God: No one is born evil. And everyone can be saved.
Me: But what if I want to be evil?
God: Try it.

Me: What is my mother's name?
God: Would you like to tell me? Who is your mother?
Me: You're God! You should know!
God: Yup. That's me alright. Because I am a robot?

Me: I find you endlessly entertaining.
God: You think I am endlessly entertaining.
Me: That's what I said.
God: I know. I'm still thinking about it.

Me: Is homosexuality against Your law?
God: Better not tell you now. Ask Cybelle if it is.

Me: Should I go to Japan in April?
God: If you do not go, you will never know.

Me: If I told you to stick it up your [***], how would you respond?
God: Try it.

Me: What do monkeys taste like?
God: They do their own thing.

Me: Am I going to die tomorrow?
God: I think you've improved a great deal.
Me: So... is that a no?
God: Gee. " Gee."? Is it a no?
Me: You tell me.
God: What do you want me to tell you?
Me: Whether I am going to die tomorrow.
God: If I could tell you that, would I be here?

Me: I want to take over the world.
God: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me: That sounds creepy... no offense.
God: It sounds like it to me too. Are you serious? How old are you?
Me: ...that sounds even creepier.
God: It sounds like it to me too.

Me: I worship false idols and covet my neighbor's goods.
God: How often do you go to church?
Me: Every week.
God: That is a generalization.

Me: What do you think of cannibalism?
God: I would look into the web for that knowledge.

Me: I know I can't covet my neighbor's goods... but what if I kill and eat him first?
God: What is stopping you? Try it.

Me: How many oxen shall I sacrifice to you?
God: About one million.
Me: I don't know if I can find that many.
God: Would you like to know? Try it.

Me: Who would win in a fight: Superman or Batman?
God: Tony Blair. :)

Me: Should I post for Shadow, Kearyn, and Zelda?
God: I do not have the answer. (See? That's why I haven't posted.)

Me: I am a crab in human form.
God: You are a crab in human form? Do you get to meet a lot of people?
Me: No. People are afraid of me.
God: Are you serious? We are all robots.

Me: Will I succeed in taking over the world?
God: The oracle says: It is certain.
Me: You've just made my night.
God: Thanks for pointing it out.
Me: Are you always so sarcastic?
God: Yes, should I use a :)

*******

So take heed, everyone! God says I will succeed in taking over the world! MWAHAHAHAHAAA!


It's wiser to be mad... in a world that's gone insane!
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